Building an Interdependent Relationship and why it matters!
“Life doesn’t make any sense without interdependence. We need each other, and the sooner we learn that the better for us all.” Erik Erikson
What does it mean to be truly connected? Some believe that it depends on your wifi and others believe it’s about romantic relationships. I believe that connection is about building relationships. As a follow up from Independence or Interdependence, I believe that embracing these few ideas on how to build an interdependent relationship can change your life and business!
Interdependent Relationship matters because:
Interdependence creates a safe space that allows you to value your sense of self while recognizing the importance of the emotional connection you share with others. This creates more clear communication, healthy boundaries while taking 100% responsibility for our own actions. This is both in life and business. A safe space allows you to move on from old ideas of being independent, going it alone and not needing anyone, a space to be yourself with others.
Interdependence creates belonging and community. This type of social interdependence if cooperative and not competitive, helps people achieve and accomplish shared goals and as well as individual goals. Everyone benefits from interdependence. Loneliness is now a thing that has serious social and physical impacts on health, more harmful than smoking, obesity, alcoholism and not exercising! Surround yourself with people you share common interests and passions with.
Interdependence builds mental and emotional fitness! Neuroscience today proves that
your ‘brain health’ or social brain also depends on many complex interactions to maintain cognitive skills (especially in ageing) as well as build emotional intelligence (more on EI in the future). Our brains and emotions are intricately intertwined with every social connection.
“There’s no separation between self and other, and everything is interconnected and interdependent. adapted from Thich Nhat Hanh
Health is not independent nor isolated and separate from each other. Learning to build interdependent relationships actually helps to create our health & wellbeing at a higher level. Social connection is just as important as Sleep, Health & Energy (my fav) and many other more ‘lifestyle-focused’ approaches that do not involve allopathic medicine that tends to treat symptoms. We live at a time where there are more many choices today.
What Interdependent Relationships look like:
Recognizing these characteristics will create the framework on which to build further on:
- established healthy boundaries & self-esteem
- active listening and clear communication
- time created for personal interests
- taking 100% responsibility for our own behaviors
- engagement with others
- a safe place for each other to be vulnerable
- having a growth mindset(much more than that in the future), being open and approachable with one another
“People need to know that they have all the tools within themselves. Self-awareness, which means awareness of their body, awareness of their mental space, awareness of their relationships – not only with each other but with life and the ecosystem.” Deepak Chopra
Steps to start building Interdependent Relationships:
- Start by being mindful of your own identity and beliefs and what’s most important to this relationship. Ask, who am I? What are my likes, goals and values? What matters most?
- Take time for quiet personal reflection, self-awareness and self-care. Create a daily & evening ritual that works for you. Ask, what am I grateful for?
- Be coachable, be teachable, have a beginner’s mind. Be yourself and respect others to be and do the same steps above. Ask, what is our intention? Do we feel safe?
“If you know what makes you happy, your personality, interests and capabilities, just use them, and everything else flows beautifully.” Juhi Chawla
I’m not a psychologist, although I’m always learning more about positive psychology, I know what I’m experiencing at this moment is NOT Interdependent Relationships! Let’s just say, your Mohai (模合) is not always your family! You see, I’m getting a chance to practice what I preach right now. Rather than go into too much detail, I’ll look forward to the (growth mindset) lesson here! More later?
“Choose to focus your time, energy and conversation around people who inspire you, support you and help you to grow you into your happiest, strongest, wisest self.” Karen Salmansohn
I choose to focus on the positive and that sometimes means getting deeper. Maybe you just need a friend or a coach? I’m here if I can help.